Chapter 14—Peacemaking Circles

Nogales, Arizona: A Vision Becomes a Reality
A few months after the roundtable of experts came together to develop the Healing and Peacemaking Circle models, I received an email from Mary Helen Maley, a criminal court judge in Arizona. Judge Maley had read Insult to Injury and wondered if I could help her establish Peacemaking Circles for people in her county who had been arrested for family violence crimes. I warned her that the process would involve enormous local support, but Judge Maley was committed to pursuing the idea. I agreed to come out to Nogales to introduce the concept of Peacemaking Circles to an assembled group of interested professionals and community leaders.

When we met at the airport, I was immediately struck by Judge Maley’s energy and focus. On the drive to Nogales, she told me a little bit about her town. “There are twenty thousand people in Nogales,” Judge Maley said, “mostly Hispanic and Spanish-speaking. Nearly everyone has relatives in Mexico, just five minutes from where I live.” She and her husband, John Maynard (an elected member of the Santa Cruz County Board of Supervisors) have lived in Nogales for twenty years. “We love Mexican culture and appreciate the beauty of the land,” she said. “It is a very special place.” At the same time, she conceded, many families in Nogales are burdened by poverty, drug and alcohol addiction and the uncertainty of their immigration status. Her job made her acutely aware of the problems plaguing her town.

She told me that she was expecting fifty people at the two-day conference, and that she’d invited them from all over Santa Cruz County. Why, I asked her, had she become so interested in this idea, and why did she think it would work for the people of Nogales?

“Last summer, I vowed to my husband that I was done being a judge unless I could find a treatment for the countless families who cycle through my courtroom on family violence charges. If it isn’t violence between the wife and husband, it’s the son and mother. It’s out of control.” Maley went looking for possible treatment approaches in books about domestic violence at the local bookstore, but she was disappointed in what she found: an emphasis on solutions that weren’t true to her experience. “The problem with batterer’s treatment is that it doesn’t work—it only treats half the problem. I was looking for a holistic solution, one that treated the whole family. The families in Nogales, they almost always stay together—they are Latino, Catholic, and held together by their links to Mexico. The idea that they will divorce, or even separate for longer than a day or two, is ridiculous.” Then she learned about Circles, and wondered if they might be the approach she was looking for.

There was already a crowd of people at the hotel—judges, legal aid attorneys, probation officers, treatment providers, and clergy—waiting for the conference to begin. Maley was clearly a force in her community—a bridge builder—who appeared to command the respect of Mexican, Anglo, and Latino people alike.

After introducing the general principles of the Healing and Peacemaking Circles, I asked the audience to think about how such a program might work in Nogales: “You could offer the program to a defendant either after he or she pleads guilty, or before—it’s up to you and Arizona law. Once the defendant is in the program, he or she is called an ‘applicant.’ The victim is called a ‘participant.’” I reminded them that the process was strictly voluntary: “The participant can choose to participate in the circle or not—it is up to them to decide.”

Safety, I stressed, must be paramount: “An intake assessment determines whether it is safe for the victim to participate—you want to hear from both parties, in separate interviews, about how dangerous the relationship feels, and what the history has been.” I explained how there are certain standard questions to ask to determine the level of violence in the relationship and whether it’s life-threatening for the victim. I described the importance of the Initial Social Compact—the document the applicant signs promising not to be violent and agreeing to simultaneously participate in any other treatments that might be necessary (treatment for alcoholism, for example). It was during these first discussions that the Circle keeper would identify a safety monitor with the help of the participants

I also talked about who might participate in addition to the applicant and participant—extended family, support people, community members. “Some participants will want their extended family to come to all of the Circles; others will want them to participate in more limited ways. But it is good to include extended family to ensure that everyone is engaged in the healing process—that someone isn’t inadvertently undermining all the effort taking place in the Circle because he or she feels left out.” I emphasized the importance of preparing each person who participates in the Circle for the fact that all participants must be supported so that they feel comfortable saying what’s on their minds. Without such preparation, one person will end up dominating the circle and diverting attention away from the problem at hand. Members of the larger community should be engaged in the Peacemaking Circle process as well; the inclusion of religious leaders, engaged friends, and neighbors both reinforces the idea of a nonviolent standard of behavior and communicates that the community cares about the struggling couple— they are not alone.

The rules and shared values of circles needed to be explicit from the beginning: no further violence; no blame; and instead a focus on acknowledgment, understanding, responsibility, and healing. It was also important to identify the underlying issues that might be contributing to the violence, and for everyone in the Circle to participate in addressing those issues.

Circles could continue indefinitely; what span of time would be right for Nogales? Given that Peacemaking Circles were being considered as an alternative to the Batterer Intervention Program offered through the courts, it was decided that the Circles would be held for the standard legal treatment period in Arizona: twenty-six weeks for first-time offenders. We envisioned that the program would therefore be one of two options for mandated treatment, along with BIPs, when someone was arrested for a family violence crime.

At that point, the large group broke into smaller groups to work on designing the specifics of a program to fit the needs of the Nogales community. They addressed questions such as the following: Where would they send clients who needed help with their drinking as well as their violence? (To a nearby alcohol treatment program.) What if someone refused to sign the Initial Social Compact? (He or she would be excluded.) How would those assembled generate community support for the program? (Through events and publicity.) They formed a Restorative Justice Advisory Team that very afternoon—a community group willing to take responsibility for the development of the Circle program

By the end of two days, the group had created their own Circles program and named it “Construyendo Circulos de Paz” or “Constructing Circles of Peace.” It was the first restorative justice treatment program of its kind for intimate violence in the nation. With grants from the Andrus Family Fund—a small family foundation in New York City—it was up and running within months of my initial visit. The National Science Foundation (NSF) also approved funding to compare the CCP program to a batterer intervention program. This meant that offenders would be randomly sent to either CCPs or BIPs to judge which program was more effective at reducing violence.

To date, over fifty applicants have completed their six-month period of treatment. More than eighty community members now participate in the Circle process in Nogales by volunteering their time. Some contribute to the Restorative Justice Advisory Team, which meets monthly to discuss the program and its progress. Dozens of others sit in on Circles, week after week, supporting families through the healing process. The results of the NSF-funded study are still being analyzed, but anecdotally the program is considered a great success.

One applicant said of his experience:

I am very happy that I participated. I was confused, worried, frustrated, nervous, and didn’t know what to expect. I had participated in other groups, and I thought this would be the same—that I would attend just to get a signature and to get a release from the court—but I was wrong. As I continued with the circle, I started to see changes in my life. I learned that it takes hard work to change a bad habit and form a good one.

I learned how to be more organized and practiced time management, which made my stress level come down. I also learned that the world didn’t have to come to an end because of the incident and how good things can come from the bad.

I hope to continue to apply what I learned by continued determination and perseverance and with the help of my family, which has been my support. My family also plans to continue the Circle once a month so we can continue to support each other. My family is also grateful because they made good changes and also learned new things that helping them live better.

A victim participant who has three children with one of the applicants who participated was stunned by the Circle’s success:

“My husband…has changed dramatically. One of the reasons why he changed is because of the circle that we participated in…Now he has a lot of communication with me. He’s not violent at all. He talks a lot to the kids. He didn’t used to do that much before, but now he’s like a completely different person.”

Judge Maley is also very pleased with the results of the Circles work in Nogales:

“CCP has completely changed how our community thinks about how to address domestic violence. We finally have a way of healing the violence and dealing with the underlying issues. It really is a fantastic solution for all those involved. We are now using Circles for community problems—it is a process that works for so many social issues.”

Setback or Transition?
Nevertheless, the Circles occasionally have setbacks. As is typical of any treatment program, a few subsequent arrests have been reported in CCPs. At first, any violations of the Social Compact were viewed as failures. In addition, if someone was arrested, even if it was for a crime that was unrelated to domestic violence, the case was immediately to be sent back to the judge for a jail sentence, and the offender would often be denied additional Circles or treatment. (This is how BIPs customarily handle similar violations.) Then something important happened in one of the early Circles involving a twenty-year-old name José.

José had been assigned to a Circle after hitting his mother during a fight and getting arrested. At first, José seemed to be responding very well to the treatment, but then his Circle participants were notified that he had been arrested again—this time for possession of cocaine. They were furious and bitter because they’d spent several weeks discussing José’s drug problems; his relapse made them feel as though they’d been duped. Together, a number of the Circle participants marched over to the jail to confront José and tell him they were disbanding the Circle; his domestic violence case would therefore be sent back to the judge.

When they arrived, however, they discovered that José was embarrassed and apologetic, and their anger dissipated; instead of admonishing him, they held a Circle at the jail and encouraged him to speak his mind. He talked about how hard it was to give up his addiction. In response, the others reminded him of his hopes-to live with his girlfriend and baby—and he became more resolved than ever to change. José told them that he wanted so badly to be a good boyfriend and father, but he just didn’t know how.
Insight into ways to handle these kinds of setbacks was further bolstered by the pioneering work of the Andrus Family Fund. Steve Kelban and the entire board of directors at Andrus believe that social change organizations that focus on the difficulties of transition are more likely to be successful in effecting lasting change than other groups. Kelban introduced the Nogales program to the Transition Framework model, developed by Bill Bridges in the 1970s, and we started to incorporate it into our thinking about Circles.
Bridges believes that people are constantly changing, but few of us pay close enough attention to the process of transition that underlies that change. Bridges and the Andrus Fund distinguish between “change,” which is “external and situational” (moving to a new country, having a baby, ending the cycle of violence), and “transition,” which is the “internal process of how one responds to the change,” in other words, how it feels to go through these changes and how we manage those feelings

Bridges believes that there are three stages of transition. First, an individual relinquishes an allegiance to something that has been part of his life for a long time: his bachelorhood, say, or his violent behavior. Bridges calls this the process of “Ending,” This is perhaps the most difficult stage for many people; even when the anticipated change is theoretically a positive one, an individual may not be ready for all that the change might bring with it. (“I still may slap my wife if she deserves it.”) In other words, old ways die hard.
The second stage is the “Neutral Zone,” in which the person has agreed to the changes in principle but still feels the pull of old ways of being. This “limbo” period anticipates the future and therefore can be exciting, but it can also generate tremendous anxiety and insecurity. (“I want to stop hitting my wife, but maybe I can’t. And will she still respect me if I don’t hit her?”) These feelings, in turn, encourage people to revert to old coping mechanisms, making it very difficult to stay on the path they’ve set for themselves. How one works through these ambivalent feelings is crucial

A Circle can seize these moments of ambivalence as opportunities for reflection rather than condemnation, as it did in José’s case, and this can make all the difference in the long-term results of the treatment. Rejecting or punishing the applicant during this critical period of transition may make him feel that his earlier efforts have been for nothing or that he’ll never succeed in changing

The final stage in the Bridges transition process is called “New Beginning.” This is when the individual has embraced the change, and his feelings and his behavior are in accord. (“I no longer hit my wife, and now I find that we fight less. I want to hit her less, and it is also easier to control myself even when I’m angry. I feel better about myself than I have in years.”

The Transition Framework philosophy has been incorporated into the Constructing Circles of Peace (CCP) program in Nogales and has also become one of its hallmarks. This does not mean that a recurrent act of violence would be “excused” or “forgiven.” Whether or not the Circle proceeds would depend on the judgments of all those involved, especially the victim participant, and the nature of the offense. But at the same time, one misstep would not necessarily capsize all the work and effort that had gone before. In José’s case the court and CCP worked in concert—with interesting results. The judge allowed the Circle to continue meeting after the first drug arrest. After a second one, a few months later, he was sent to jail. After a few weeks of incarceration, however, he started to use what he learned in the Circle to fortify his commitment to drug treatment. He wrote a letter to Judge Maley thanking her for his Circle and vowing to “start fresh.” José hasn’t been arrested again since his release two years ago.